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Monday, November 23, 2009

The Nuts and Bolts of Election Season

Dear insansapinas,


Election season in the Philippines does not only bring forth balimbing fruit.During filing of certificate of candidacy, nuts become bountiful.
If they are lucky enough, they become hindi-pa-man-sikat-laos na movie stars like Mr. Eddie Gil. O di va naging recording artist pa.




Some claimed that they can make the Philippines another state of the United States and all Filipinos would become American citizen.DUH


What is interesting is that they are the first to file. Nagpapansin talaga.


Next year, the "interesting" candidates include the following:

1.Oliver Lozano, the loyalist of Marcos said that if ever he wins the presidency he will lift the sequestration of “the multi-billion gold and dollar Marcos deposits
so it can be used to solve within six months the economic crisis, poverty, hunger and rebellion. Kung hindi magreresign daw siya. DUH Coconut.




2. Rigoberto “NNN” Madera, who claimed it is God's will that he starts as president of the Philippines, then as secretary general of the United Nations, then as president of the USA until I will be crowned as Earth emperor at Mount Sinai,” said Madera.


The 61-year-old Madera said he was called by God to run for president and claimed that an October survey by the Almighty revealed that he is the number one bet for president.HINDI KO ALAM NAGCOCONDUCT DIN NG SURVEY AND DIYOS. Pili nuts.


3. meron isang 81 year old na babae from Bulancan. Hello, hello, are you nuts?


Ang ipinagtataka ko naman sa COmeLEC bakit pinagkakabalahan pa nila itong isama sa listahan.


May mga kandidato naman na hindi sinasabi na utos sa kanila ng Diyos ang magkandidato pero alam naman nilang kung si Gibo Teodoro ay 2 per cent lang ang nakukuha, baka sila, isa lang boboto kundi ang kanilang sarili.




The others who filed include 40-year-old quantum physics professor Gilbert Garcia, 46-year-old businessman Vicente Fabella, 56-year-old masseuse Josefina Murillo, 70-year-old retired teacher Peter Pelegrino, and 63-year-old licensed insurance agent Carmelo Carreon.
Also aspiring to join the presidential derby are 52-year-old financial consultant Vetallano Acosta, 49-year-old barangay chairman Daniel Magtira, 64-year-old retired teacher Ernesto Balite, and 52-year-old Min Bilad Villaflor

The Bolts


This refers to the people who bolted from one political party to another which they think is like a sinking ship. So alisan na sila at takbuhan na sa popular na political party. Let's call the roll.




Hindi pa kasama dito ang butterfly na paiba-iba nag party para lang siya ay makakandidata. 


Loren, loren sinta, puno ng papaya.
dala dala'y buslo....


Pinaysaamerika

3 comments:

Lee said...

hahahahahaha obvious ba na kaya pinapatulan e mga bayaran yan para panggulo sa eleksyon at pampabawas ng mga boto sa mga totoong kandidato.
ang pinas pa,parang
kulang kapagka walang clowns.
e bakit naman? e ang comelec ang joker e.
teka makatakbo nga rin, anu naman ang flatta-puroporma ko kung sakali?
pagagandahin ko lahat ng shopping mall, at everyday my bargain bwahahaha.

cathy said...

matutuwa saiyo si henry sy niysn.

Lee said...

sinabi mo pa mam hahahaha baka bigla ako bigyan ng sariling SM outlet, tambakan ng shoes at clothes ko hahahaha...
tumabi ka meldy,
di lang 3000 pairs ng shoes ang hahakutin ko ahahahaha