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Tuesday, July 31, 2012

Daily Schedule

Dear insansapinas,


I follow a daily routine at home hindi lang dahil sa aking C but also due to my D and H. Hindi lang sleeping  zzzzzzzzz. Oops, Biglang mulat. At six, I should be awake for my first pill (hypertension) and the taking of the blood sugar level before I eat my breakfast.
I am not in any diabetic meds these days so I have to watch out for my bs level not to go lower than the ideal para hindi maulit yong bigla na lang na CCU. Noon naman kasi ang pag-inom ko ng aking mga pills ay minsan isang medicine cabinet sa morning at isang medicine cabinet sa evening. Ang mga pills magkakasama at ang gagawin ko na lang ay NGANGA, INOM, glug, glug, glug, e marami na akong parmasyutikang pinayayaman. Diabetic meds ko lang noon anim. Eh yong pang sa puso, sa blood pressure at mga medical supplies pa. Ngayon, bawas na.


Pagkatapos breakfast, personal hygiene (wisik dito, wisik doon).  Another pill for blood pressure, pill for potassium at pill para sa bakal. (IRON) Kailangan daw may panghambalos. Pero pag inom naman, kailangang may stool softener kung hindi maghintay ka ng Pasko bago may lumabas. Pahid ng noo.


Bago kumain ng tanghali, check na naman ng blood sugar. Kailangan bang kumain ng may matamis?
Two hours after lunch, check na naman.


Ang huling pagcheck ay bago matulog. In the meantime, ang dugo ay nakikipag-laro sa chem meds. Minsan itim ang marka; minsan reddish.


So appreciate whatever good health you are enjoying right now. 
Thank HIM.


Pinaysaamerika



Sunday, July 29, 2012

Blender

Dear insansapinas,


I lost more than ten pounds for the last few days. It is not only due to loss of appetite during the chemotherapy treatment but also the pain of swallowing food particles even those  small sizes.


A booster shot was done a day after chemo meds were "hosed " down to my blood system. Side effect, masakit, so I was brought to the ER where I was given painkiller meds that will make you drowsy  that you could hardly open your eyes. But first, syempre, kita muna sila. Pinotoshoot nila ako sa chest at sa upper stomach para walang ibang organs na involved. Smile. Tapos pinauwi ako with painkiller prescriptions na hindi pwedeng makuha ng basta-basta.

Tuesday, July 24, 2012

SONA Red Carpet Fashion Show 2012 of the Legislators and Wives

Dear insansapinas,
The SONA will not be complete without the attendance of the legislators and their wives whose gowns are designed by fashion designers and couturiers.

This year, these are the women who shashayed and walked with their respective spouses/families and friends.


kris aquino and boy abunda
manny and jinkee

lani mercado and daughter

risa hontiveros

lucy gomez and richard gomez

Thursday, July 19, 2012

Chemo Treatment

Dear insansapinas,

Early morning of Thursday, my brother and I went to the hospital to continue my chemo treatment.I was the earliest and so the nurse had to call my oncologist if she can proceed.




There were six chairs for the patients and an hour or so, the chairs were already taken. But there was only one nurse so that she was the only one who took charge of the preparation and chemo treatment management. Some patients watched the small TV monitor for news and programs.There was a father-daughter team who played cards while the treatment was going on. Some were chit-chatting. I read a pocketbook and observed the nurse doing her tasks of changing meds/changing her gloves more than twenty times and talked with patients to comfort them. The chairs are convertible to mini-beds.




It was the IV which used up the time for connection to the meds. Mine and another woman were implanted with pedi-ports so all the nurse did was to inject the needles.

Wednesday, July 18, 2012

The Medi-Port

Dear insansapinas,


Pasensiya kayo kung kinukuwento ko kung anong ginagawa ng aking specialist sa akin (oncologist). Pinaschedule niya ako sa ospital para lagyan ako ng medi-port. Yon ang dadaaanan ng chemo na ilalagay naman sa akin bukas.


So pagkatapos ng tatlong timbang dugo, ikinabit na ako sa oxygen, sa antibiotics at sa magpapatulog sa akin. Siguro sa nerbiyos, di ako nakatulog. Nararamdaman ko ang ginagawa sa akin. Nagmulat ako ng mga mata, maraming plastic na nakacover sa akin. Nag-uusap ang mga doctor at nurses.


Mga mahigit isang oras ang nakalipas, isa-isa ng tinanggal ang mga nakakabit sa akin. Masakit yong hiniwa. Pagkatapos na advisan ako kung ano ang aking mga gagawin, isinakay ako sa wheelchair at dinala sa sasakyan. Saka lang umepekto ang pampatulog. zzzzzzzzzzzzzz


Pinaysaamerika

No Call

Dear insansapinas,
I was expecting the visiting nurse yesterday. She did not come. I called the agency and the person who responded informed me that the nurse is sick. Biglang taas ang BP ko. So I asked why she did not bother to call and inform me.Excuses, excuses, excuses. I said next time, a day before coming, they have to call me to confirm. Tchp 


Nursing registry and home health care agency are the two businesses that I helped put up in California with friends. We were very particular with the schedules of the nurses and other staff assigned to our patient/clients. We checked if they are available and if there are substitutes if they are not. When we were beginning, we even offered them rides so that we were assured that they would be in the patient's place on time. We also did not allow the staff to change their schedules with the patients. Whatever changes were made, we had it done in the office for coordination and information purposes. Dito sa agency na ito, nagpapalit ng sked yong nurse, cnas at 
therapists thru patients. 

Tuesday, July 17, 2012

The Memory-Do they remember you?

Dear insansapinas,


If you have been following the story of my life, you know that this "cat" been gifted with several lives. For the last two years, however, after I was diagnosed with cancer in 2007 and was declared by the oncologist that it was gone in 2008, another diagnosis was made again in 2010; liver cancer, liver cirrhosis aside from diabetes and hypertension. In later part of 2011, another cancer (not a metastases) was found in my breast; two of them. I had them mastectomied last April and now I am undergoing chemo.


So when my visiting nurse informed me that the cause of my confinement in the hospital was RESPIRATORY FAILURE,(STOPPED BREATHING)  I can't helped but think, sa dami ng mga sakit ko, maoospital lang pala ako sa pagkalimot ng paghinga. Acheche.


What has this to do with my title? As I have said kung pinakikialaman ninyo ang buhay ko, sa bawa't buhay na isinasalba ako ni Bossing sa Itaas dahil ako ay masamang damo, marami akong eksperyensiya doon sa kalagitnaan ng Langit at Lupa. Di ba kinuwento ko noon na may nakita akong Napakalaking Pinto na sa Loob ay may Bright Light na pilit lumalabas sa mga siwang. Ang sabi sa akin ng isang babae doon, nasa loob daw ang Boss. Tapos bigla akong nagdisappear. Balik sa mundo.


Pero itong nakalipas na mahigit dalawang Linggo ako sa CCU at sa hospital, iba ang aking experiensiya na siyang mag-eexplain bakit tama nga ang ginagawa ng iba na pagnamamatay ang mahal nila sa buhay, hinihiling nila na tulungan sila o huwag silang pabayaan.


Let me esplain. Sa pagkakahiwalay ko sa aking katawan noong nasa ospital ako (hiwalay yon kasi kahit nakamulat ako at parang gising, hindi naman nila ako makausap at hindi ko rin naman natandaan ang mga ginawa nila sa katawan ko) may mga nakasama akong mga "tao" na" kau-kausap" ko. Pero ang natatandaan ko lang ay ang aking daddy na parang sinalubong lang ako at ang aking mother na hindi ako iniwanan. In fact nandoon  siya palagi. Tinatanong ko ang sarili ko kung sino ang mga "taong" nandoon. 


Ang nakakapag-isip ay ang aking nakikita sa mundo ng mga buhay. Kilala ko ang aking kapatid na nakabantay sa akin, pamilyar sa akin ang binabanggit niyang mga pangalan na related sa akin at sa amin. Ngayon ko narerealize na ang connection mo sa mga mahal mo sa buhay ay di napuputol. Lalo na kung tatawagin ka at aalalahanin. Nabanggit ng aking kapatid ang pangalan ng aking tsikiting gubat at doon sa "kinaroroonan" ko ay nanatili yon hanggang nagpilit akong gumaling. 


Naalala ko ang aking dating tenant na matanda. Naulila raw siya ng bata pa siya. Halos di  niya na matandaan ang mukha  ng mother niya. Pero minsang nagkasakit siya at halos  mamatay, may nakita siyang babae na nagpakita sa kaniya at sinabing siya ang mother niya. Hindi ba kataka-taka yan? Naalala pa nong ispiritu?

Sunday, July 15, 2012

High Blood Pressure and Masamang Damo

Dear insansapinas,
Even if I was checked out from the hospital and rehab, the attending medical staff asked  me to approve the home visitations of the nurse, therapist and nursing assistants. Hokey, except for the nursing assistant whose function is to assist me in bathing. Silipan pa niya ako. Tse. There is no need naman eh because my brother installed a grab bar for me to hold on when I get to the bath tub, a rubber bath mat to make the tub flooring not slippery and a hand-held shower to enable me to control the temperature and flow of the water from the bath water pipe. Meron pang upuan.


My primary doctor temporarily asked me to stop diabetic and blood pressure meds so that the nurse has to monitor my vital signs. I've got also sphygmomanometer, pulse meter and glucometer but the determination as to what readings are good for me depend on the nurse.

 Kaso ang problema, dahil and bayad sa kanila ay per visit /per patient, gusto nila maraming mavisit. So, kapag may bago silang tanggap at nagconflict sa sched mo, itatry nilang baguhin ang iyong sked kung papayag ka, May isang araw na limang beses yatang tumawag para palitan from 3 to 11 or 10 to 1. . Minsan triny nilang magpalit ng sked to the extent na yong physical therapist gustong pumunta rito pagkagaling ko sa doctor para maaccomodate yong bagong pasyente. Ano siya nababaliw?  Paano akong makakapag-exercise kung halos hindi ako makalakad sa pagod. Sabi ko, NO. Kumg hindi siya pwede, di huwag siyang pumunta. taray.


Kahapon, tumatawag na naman, kung pwede raw ngayong Sunday. Ano? Wala na ba silang day of worship. Sabi ko, NO. Ako na lang ang mag-eexercise.


Masamang Damo


I talked with a friend of mine. She told me that our co-faculty in the Graduate School died of heart attack last June 20.

Friday, July 13, 2012

Bone Marrow Biopsy and Out-of-Body Experience

Dear insansapinas,
Before I was discharged from the hospital/rehab facilities, my oncologist required me to undergo bone marrow biopsy. His intention was to find out what is causing the decline in the white blood corpuscles, the change in the hemoglobin and platelets. These are symptoms of leukemia and bone marrow dysfunction. Like Dolphy, I was susceptible to infection.


This week, the cancer doctor attributed the blood problems to my iron deficiency and the chemotherapy treatment which is temporarily halted until the hospital can put port in my body where the meds will pass. Para bang canal na dadaanan. Hirap talaga ng maysakit pero panay pa rin ang bantay sa akin ni Bossing sa Itaas. Sabi ng kaibigan ko, ang lakas ko raw. Sabi ng mother ng kaibigan ko, baka raw kasi may mission pa ako. Ano Mission Impossible? tan-tan-tan.


Honestly, you do not feel the pain when you are experiencing out- of -body- experience. What feels the pain is the physical body. It does not mean also that when the patient appears to be conscious, his spirit is still there.


When I was in the hospital and the doctor declared that I was not breathing, that must be when I was met by my mother. She showed me three houses which doors she promptly closed. Sabi niya, hindi ka wedeng pumasok.  She said that my heart is strong.
Ilan na bang near-death-experience ko ito starting when I died when I was a baby and my mother had me baptized. 


Why did I say that the soul does not feel the pain and discomfort because of the sickness? Because my friend, all the while that I was in the CCU last May, I was fighting it out with the hospital staff by removing the tubes that were in my throat, my nose and my arms that they had to tie my arms in the bed railings so that I can not reach the tubings. I was not even aware and remember of what I have done.  What I remembered was my visit to California, to the Philippines and the things that I should do.

 I was even surprised that I could easily move from one place to another.  My brother told me that all the while I appeared to be awake and was just quiet and asked questions which happened in the past.  The truth was I was out. So when my brother let me read his notes about my hospitalization, I said that I must be sleeping while they were talking to me.


So I can now say that families could do more favor to the  long suffering bed-ridden relative  to just say good bye to the world.


Pinaysaamerika

Wednesday, July 11, 2012

The Women and the Children of Dolphy

 Dear insansapinas,
Dolphy died a bachelor with seventeen biological children and one adopted.daughter. He had also romantic relationships with several women.

His first common law wife was Engracia (Gracia )Dominguez, a stage actress. He had six children:
1. Manuel (Manny Boy)
 2. Sahlud (Sahlee)
3. Rodolfo, Jr. (Junior)
4. Freddie (Baby)
5. Edgar 
6. Raul (Rolly) 

The next woman in his life with whom he had four children was Gloria Smith.These are their children:
1. Mariquit
2. Carlos
3. Geraldino (Dino)
4. Edwin

With Baby Smith (Pamela Ponti) a movie star in the Philippine movies, he has three: They are:
1. Enrico (Eric Quizon)
2. Jeffrey (Epi Quizon)
3. Ronaldo (Ronnie Quizon)
4. Madonna (Donna)

 With a nurse named Evangeline Tugalao, he had one son .
1. Rommel
He had also one son with Alma Moreno
1. Van Dolph

Zsa Sza Padilla and Dolphy had one biological and one adopted daughter.
1. Zia
2. Nicole (adopted)

Dolphy almost married Pilar Pilapil and Lotis Key.

Pinaysaamerika

Tuesday, July 10, 2012

Dolphy said goodbye to the world

Dear insansapinas,

When Dolphy asked that he be brought home, it was already his spirit who was wishing it. He knew he's going home to where he came from.

Dolphy died at age 83, today, July 10, 2012 a few days shorter his 84th birthday. I will always remember him as John Puruntong, " the Kaya ikaw John, magsumikap ka" in John and Marsha. He has joined his " wife Marsha
(Nida Blanca).

Pinaysaamerika

Monday, July 09, 2012

Hospital and Rehab

Dear insansapinas,

Nag-aadjust a rin ako. Biruin mo namang almost two months akong nasa hospital facilities di wala akong ginawa kung hindi ang mahiga at magtherapy.

Dolphy wants already to go home. I do not blame him. There is no rest in the hospital. Amost every hour, there is somebody to check on you, your vital signs and if you are not feeling pain.

In the hospital, I became aware of my surroundings after I was moved from CCU to the regular room and all my tubes were removed.

In the rehab, I hardly slept. The nurses outside my room were noisy.I was near the nurses desk. The room of the door was left slightly open for emergency purposes.






Ala una ng midnight, bigla kang gigisingin for meds. Para bang Ano yon, nasaan ang sunog, anong nangyari, blah blah.

Dalawang beses, may pumasok na isang pasyente sa kuwarto ko. Pinipilit niya kuwatrto raw niya. Confused pala. Ngiiiii.

Minsan naman, isang matandang babae, nakababa na ang kaniyang tapalodo, magbabathroom daw siya. Ngiii.

Hana kaagad ako ng mask. Bawal sa akin ang nakikipag-usap ng walang mask.

Pinaysaamerika


Thursday, July 05, 2012

I STOPPED BREATHING PART 2

Dear insansapinas,
First week of June, I was transferred from the hospital to the post acute rehab. Surprise, surprise, the manager is a Filipino, one supervisor nurse is a Filipina, a physical therapist is also a Filipino and one other staff is an American who asked me Kumusta? He lived in Bicol for three years pala.

I was isolated from other patients because I got a weak inmmune system for disease. Every staff that comes inside my room had to put on a mask and a glove.

My physical therapy on the first few days made me feel like I was one baby learning how to walk steadily. The therapist had to secure me in my waist with a band while I took few steps to walk a less than 2 meter distance. The other therapist worked on my arms and shoulders. There were equipment that were brought to my room for therapy purposes.

Wednesday, July 04, 2012

I STOPPED BREATHING

Dear insansapinas,
Kulit ng batang ito. Sabi siguro ni Bossing sa Itaas.

I have just been discharged from the hospital facilities after two months of battle for life not because of my C but because of my D-iabetes.

My brother found me unconscious in my bedroom last May. He could not wake me up. He called 9-11 and an ambulance was quickly dispatched to our home. He did not ride along with the paramedics. He drove his car and followed the red lighted trucks in the ER of the hospital.

The doctor told him that my blood pressure was high, my blood sugar was almost zero and I
STOPPED BREATHING.

.........I know who I am. But I do not know what I was doing in that top of the building looking down
the water, trees and buildings. I can see what was inside the tall building. There was a bed and a group of people in uniform. I saw my brother wearing a mask, glove and a gown. I wondered if he is already connected there. Then I felt flying. I reached San Francisco where I was looking for my former house....then I went back to the building. I was just looking from where I was. 

For days, while Dolphy was having difficulty breathing, I gave it up. I was put in the CCU with all
the tubes and ventilator taking charge.

After days, I opened my eyes. They can not communicate with me. The neurosurgeon ordered an MRI to
find out the extent of the brain damage. I can not swallow, I can not eat and I could not speak. Although
I was articulating some things which happened in the past. The doctor said that something's mixed up.
I got no appetite, I could not get up, I could not walk and I slept a lot.